Who Stole My Joy?

We live in a world that is stealing our joy. Have you noticed this phenomonon. I write today more for myself than anyone else. I have believed for years that as followers of Christ we would be a people very familiar with joy. It is one of the characteristics of a Christ follower. But can I tell you I don't see an abundance of joy in the body of Christ. I don't see an abundance of joy in my life. I really want more of it.

In fancy clinical terms there is a  diagnosis for people who do not experience joy. It is called "anhedonia" the inability to experience joy. Something has gone terribly wrong in our world. People are joyless and the use of anti-depressants is at an all time high. The other side of this is the pursuit of joy in unhealthy ways, drugs, sex, pornography, stuff, status all things that after a short rush, only deplete any joy that you might have had. It is easy for me to identify joy busters.

Religion when manipulated by man can become a huge joy buster. Satan has really used this one. People go to God hoping to find some joy and man has often created God in their image and created a theology (words about God) that ultimately steal the joy the people came to God hoping to find. This is tragic and probably needs a post all its own.

The truth is God is the source of our joy. I believe he is the source and the only place we can experience true joy. The kind of joy our heart longs for, that has nothing to do with a relationship, the job status, my bank account, the economy or whether the dog peed in the house or not. I think we look for joy in external things and the joy we desire is found first internally.

Joy is found on the inside. Kind of an inside out thing. It is found in our internal world, in the deep places of our heart and often a place we neglect to go or attend. Call it soul care, spiritual transformation whatever you want but there is a place deep within each of us that longs for attention and is the wellspring of life. 

I like the idea of a "divine spark". God's word refers to Jesus as light. C. S. Lewis spoke of the little Christ in all of us. We teach about the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. These connect and fuel our divine spark. The Christ in us is a light a spark if you will that is intended to give us life. It is present but if not attended to or cultivated the spark wanes, the light fades. Does not go away but can be so muted that we experience anhedonia. Joy becomes something that is hard to experience.

So today I pose the question. "What are some things in your life that are stealing you joy?" Beware there are many. The world we live in is all about pouring cold water on you divine spark. Identify the joy busters in you life and get rid of them, move away from them, don't empower them to steal you joy.

Then start to attend your divine spark. Like a gardener caring for her garden take care of your heart. Pull some weeds, use some fertilizer, sit in the garden of your heart and meet God again.If you want to be warm stand by the fire, if you want to be wet get in the water, if you want to know joy go to the source.  Slowly I believe our divine spark can begin to glow brighter and brighter. It can begin to light our path. It is the cure for anhedonia. You can rediscover joy and joy is contagious. Once we start to experience it, others are blessed by it. So find your joy and share it with the world around you.

Peace, todd

A Divine Appointment

I am currently re-reading the Shack. Have been fascinated at the buzz this book has created. Young has stirred-up something significant even if he has made many uncomfortable, even mad. I am re-reading because of a men's group that I am, who wanted to read and discuss. This read I am moving through the book with a little different view. I came across something last week that jumped off the page.

Papa has invited Mack back to the shack. While pondering, if God would send a message and even if he had why would he want Mac to return to the shack. Mack ask this question. "And why the shack- the icon of his deepest pain?" I would argue that if you get nothing from this book this is a question worthy of thought.

Young tackles many big ideas in this book. But none more important than this idea of God meeting us at the deepest place of our pain. If I ask you today, " what is the deepest wound of your heart?" What comes to mind? Is there something that comes quickly but you push it back and search for something a little more comfortable. Something that maybe does not hurt quite as bad. Maybe you know exactly what the deepest pain is and that thought brings strong emotion and the idea that the pain and heart ache you feel will never go away.

Why would God want to meet us at that place? Why would a loving God want us to revisit that pain and heartache? Maybe you have even thought. "How could a good God have ever allowed that to happen to me?" Where was he when this happened and why did he not step in and do something, anything? All of these are fair and good questions.

On the other side maybe you have chosen to believe, bad things happen to good people every day and that is just how it is. I just need to have faith and get over it. Be strong, don't question and just move on. No need to dwell on the past it does no good. I will somehow just pretend this never really happened and move on. I guess at some level I understand this attitude as well. It is basic survival. A kind of pain avoidance.

But what if God wanted each of us to revisit our own personal "shack". The icon of our deepest pain. Not live there, not go there and stay forever, but go there so we could find healing and wholeness. 

I believe it is at the place of our deepest wound, that we can find God. It is at this place we can discover once and for all that God is real. We can discover at this place of helplessness and vulnerability that God is in fact good. I think if you strip everything away that really is the question we and the world are asking. "Is God good?" "Can God be trusted?"

The place of our deepest wound would suggest that he is not good, that he can not be trusted. That he will not show up when you need him the most and will only disappoint. I get why people would believe this. But I know if you are brave enough to visit you own personal shack and when God shows up and he will, something changes in your life. The reality of the one true living God starts to heal. You discover that he can be trusted, that he is faithful. You are given new eyes and a new heart. 

So do you have a divine appointment? If so, be brave, walk into the pain believing God will meet you there. It will be risky, hard and painful. How is that for encouragement? Is is worth the risk. And much better than the alternative. 

If you have visited you own personal shack, tell others about it. People need hope, they need to know the reality of a living and loving God. At some level this book Young has written has given people hope. You story will do the same. Share it!

Peace, todd

Getting God Fit

I really enjoy exercising. Especially with the kettlebell. The kettlebell is the bomb diddy and I do not even know what that is, but it is better than good. I have a Dr.'s order not to do kettlebells for two weeks. I am sure he was concerned that I was getting to strong for my own good. So I am going to have to run more over the next two weeks. The best part of running is that I can think while running. 

Yesterday I had several cool thoughts but one that is going to stick. I was running and thanking God for the time he has given me to exercise. Just reflecting on the blessing I receive from exercise and glad that the Father has given me that joy. I then decided for a time I would give God the time back plus 10%.

So here is what that will look like. I ran for 28 minutes and did some work in the garage with Jerod later for about 40 minutes. So I got to exercise for an hour and 8 minutes yesterday. Today I will give that time back to God plus 7 min. Today I will spend an hour and 10 minutes, listening to God, reading his word, writing in my journal and praying. I am really excited about this. This morning my time was wonderful and I will finish later tonight.

The Lent season starts tomorrow and I have decided this will be what I give up for lent. I have no sense that I am really giving anything up, I guess that is OK. I think God has given me a win win. I get to exercise and I get to spend time with Abba. Life is good.

Peace, todd

What's Love Got To Do With It?

What's love got to do with it? Sounds like a good line for a song. I have a few thoughts left over from valentines day. I am not a big fan of valentines day. It is a marketing racket that forces you to do something nice for you sweetie. The whole thing seems to loose  some validity when you and every other guy on the planet does something nice for someone they love. And by the way if this is the only time you do something special for that special person in your life, "shame on you."

 I am seeing more and more that love is a choice. V-day seems to eliminate some of your ability to choose. You can choose the type of flowers, the special gift or where you might go to eat, but the choice has been made for you when all of this is going to happen. For me something is lost in this. It feels forced. But I am straying from my real thought here. Was not really intending to rail on V-day just that I am not a fan. Although it did cause me to think a little about love. So, what does love got to do with it?

I have decided that maybe love has everything to do with it. Scripture tells us that, "God is love". This seems the very essence of who God is. It is funny to me how we attempt to explain God. Explain him, explain how and why he does the things that he does. Even though he clearly states in scripture, "My ways are not your ways." I don't fully understand God and actually kind of glad that I don't. But I do think about the fact that his love must be very different. A more excellent kind of love. A love I wish I could extend to others more often.

Maybe the challenge then begins how we would define love. That is where we get in trouble. Many ideas about what love really is. Most of them have to do with feelings and emotions. Specifically our own feeling and emotions. I have a thought, and it is just a thought related to this idea that God is love.

I think it is safe to say God's love is not based on an emotion that comes and goes like the Texas wind. Safe to say as well that his love is not based on, "what have you done for me lately." Some how he does not love one more than another. His love does not hinge on my response or lack of it. His love really is other. It is other than how we typically define love.

God's love seems to be a choice. He has simply chosen to love. That kind of love is other. It would not sale very easy in our culture. What if you told a man who grips about his wife, "you need to simply choose to love her." What about the wife who's husband forgot V-day again! The council was simply, "you can choose to love him." People would be lining up for that kind of council. Wouldn't they?

God's love is transforming. Maybe that has something to do with the fact that, he has chosen to love.  So, what's love got to do with it? Maybe everything, "but hey, it's your choice."

Peace, todd

With You I Am Well Pleased

One of the big moments in the life of Christ, was his baptism. God affirmed him that day in a public way. He blessed him with the words, "you are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased." God models to fathers and mothers how important the words are that are spoken over our children. I want to publicly affirm my son Michael.

Michael is  our oldest and a Sr. this year. Hard to believe he is in his final months of high school. This reality makes his mother sad and makes me reflective. Tonight is senior night for the basketball team. One of many things that will take place over the next few months that will mark the end of this season of Michael's life. So today I reflect on Michael's basketball career. 

Michael has taught me some valuable lessons through his basketball journey. I will be a better father in this area for Mason and Madison because I got to practice on Michael. Mason and Madi you really owe your brother a huge thank you for this. Maybe even a big hug. Michael I have told you many times. This was uncharted territory for both of us.

Michael taught me I was his dad not his coach. These are very different functions. The gift I have been given is to be Michael's dad first. I would forget this sometimes. Dad's love and encouragement are to be first. They also instruct from time to time but I would get the order backwards sometimes. I am slowly learning to not lead with instruction. It was often heard as criticism. I have started to see that now, but did I mention it is senior night. We are at the end and I am just know starting to see some of this. 

Here is the subtle difference. When I lead with love and encouragement I am communicating my value is in Michael as my son. When I lead with critique and coaching I think I sometimes communicated his value was somehow tied to how he played basketball. Not a good message to send to my son.

So on senior night I want Michael to know. "It really has never been about basketball. It has always been about you." Understand I enjoy basketball and I have enjoyed watching you play. But it was never about basketball, it has been about you.

So on senior night I want you to know how much I love you and how proud I am of you. You have modeled perseverance. Something you will need in life. You have worked through set-backs and disappointment. Broken wrists and sprained ankles did not stop you. You never said "why me", you stayed the course and are finishing well. I told you they do not typically give awards or do write ups for team players. But you have modeled what it means to be a team player. You have done what the coaches have ask you to do. You have worked to fill your role whether a starter or a key person off the bench. You have been about team and that is a quality we do not see much anymore. 

I love the young man you are growing into. Your time playing ball will help you as you move on to the next season of life. Your hard work, dedication, perseverance and being a team player will be characteristics that help you succeed. I believe at the core of this is a faith that I am seeing in you more and more. A faith that is becoming your own. Keep wrestling with that, keep searching and remember God is faithful.

Today I echo the words of the Father. "You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased."

Love you Michael!

Peace, dad

Thank You Sir, May I Have Another

Have you figured out that in the Kingdom things seem to be upside down. I am convinced the closer our walk with God becomes the more we start to notice how opposite He is from the world we live in. God is trying to teach me something and I am slowly starting to listen. His world is other.

God is clear He wants all of me. The struggle for me then becomes. How much of my life am I willing to submit to Him? I ask God to fill me with His presence and He is always willing, but He understands better than I that the process at best can be a little uncomfortable and at times even down right painful. 

Here is one of the ways God is other. The world is all about pain avoidance. It promotes comfort, quick fixes and raising to top as quickly as possible and if you cut a few corners or walk over a few people on the way, so be it. God calls us to lay down our lives. A process that involves dying to self. But somehow in God's economy when we die to self we actually find life. Doesn't really jive with the typical day to day message we hear in the world. But maybe we need to listen with a different ear.

Last night on Lost. If you are not watching this show be reminded, God's grace is sufficient. Sawyer and Locke are having a conversation. Sharing a quick, not exact summary here. Sawyer is questioning Locke about some past events and the pain and discomfort they created for Locke. Sawyer basically says, "Don't you wish you had made a different decision and avoided the pain it caused. Locke's answer is "other".  He responds, "No, because I would not be where I am today." He understood that, discomfort for a time ended up being life giving.

Last night I picked up some anti-inflammatory cream for my elbow that a Dr had prescribed. I rubbed it on before I went to bed and this stuff lite me up. I thought my flesh was burning from the inside out and literally could not sleep for the majority of the night. I called the Pharmacist this morning wondering why he would give me battery acid in a tube to rub on a already aching elbow. He explained how the medicine worked to block pain receptors and said something very interesting. "This is going to sound counter intuitive, (ding-ding) but what you need to do when the pain gets to intense is put some more cream on." I am thinking, "are you nuts, I just lost a night of sleep because I put this cream on my elbow, and you are telling me the thing that cased the pain will actually help relive the pain if I put more on. Sounds like a bad plan to me.

His instruction was "other". It made no sense and I did not want to follow his directions. But I also want my elbow to heal. For two months I have had no relief with methods that were comfortable. So this morning I followed his advice even though I did not want to and so far it has not been as bad as it was last night. 

What if the pain we feel sometimes, even the pain we feel that is God inflicted, is pain that might lead to healing. What if God loves us so much, He would be willing to let us experience pain and that pain was our path to healing and wholeness. That my friend is other. It is counter intuitive. 

God's ways are not our ways. I tend to forget that some days. God is eternal and He sees through a  totally different lens. I believe God understands, a little pain that can move us closer to Him, to wholeness, healing and dependence on a loving God is well worth it in the long run.

Peace,todd

Have some Faith and pass the Cream

Growing up we lived with my Grandparents for a while. They lived on a farm in Missouri. It was actually a wonderful place for a young boy to experience life. Rummaging through an old barn, playing in the hay loft or exploring the woods I was always content. No need for video games or even playmates there was always an adventure and many lessons to learn if you were attentive to the world around you.

We also had dairy cows that were milked each morning and night. Which also meant we had fresh milk in the fridge at all times. This milk was very different than the milk my children drink today. After sitting in the fridge the cream would rise to the top of the milk. You could either stir it up or skim it off the top, but left alone the cream and milk would separate even though they were in the same glass jar. 

Today I realized faith and religion are very similar to cream and milk. You can mix the two together and while similar they tend to want to separate themselves. Let me explain.

I have listened to my self and others for years talk about the difference between faith and religion and have know they are different but have not always been able to articulate that difference. Today I believe they are very different. They can coexist but it is important to understand the difference.

The Apostle Paul calls us to "live by faith not by sight". Religion tends to give us a visible road map we can follow. Faith calls us "to be sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Religion calls us to plans and processes that have shown they will work.

Seth Godin says it this way in his book Tribes. "Religion at its best is sort of a mantra, a subtle but consistent reminder that belief is okay, and that faith is the way to get where you are going. Religion at it's worst reinforces the status quo, often at the expense of our faith."

Those words jumped off the page at me. Go back and read his quote again. Religion is in no way bad, unless it gets in the way of faith. I believe in my own life and what I have seen in the lives of others, our religion often does get in the way of our faith. The church today does not need any more religion. She needs more faith. Jesus was  first and foremost a man of great faith. He pushed the envelope, he challenged the status quo and pushed back on the religious leaders of his day. He refused to settle, he hoped for what was not seen and he knew God had more to offer his people. 

Faith always leads to hope and it overcomes fear. If there was ever a time in our world that people needed to experience more hope and less fear it is now. So go skim some faith off the top of your religion and lets be the body of Christ to the world around us.

Peace, todd

More Hugs Please

I am a big fan of hugs. I like to be on the receiving end of a good hug and a love to extend a hug to others. Have been reminded of this twice in the last few days. I will share one and then hope you will watch the other.

I ran to Costco Sunday afternoon to grab a few things. May have been the busiest I have ever seen Costco.  I waited in line, seizing this moment as a gift from God to work on patience. I spotted Dave Lewis, one of my favorite guys in the world. He was two lanes over with his lovely wife Pam. I left my cart, weaved through a sea of people, reached over the counter and grabbed his arm. He looked up and I extended my hand and said hello. Dave would have none of that, he spread his arms leaned over the counter and gave me a big bear hug. It was great, right there in the middle of groceries, carts and people. We spoke briefly and I walked back to my cart.

I thought as I walked back, I want to be more like Dave. For him a handshake was not sufficient. When you see a friend you love you don't shake hands and it doesn't really matter where you are. You give each other a big hug. I decided I needed more hugs and I needed to give more hugs. 

This morning Stuart sent me a video about hugs. For me just a confirmation to be a committed participant in the hug revolution. You have to watch this video. It is beautiful and a sweet reminder of how important it is to reach out. To look for opportunities to be Jesus with skin on. I am confidant Jesus is a good hugger. So, I am saying "more hugs please", and I am inviting you to join me.

Peace, todd    http:/epicfeats.com/media/p/195.aspx

Amazing Grace How Sweet the Smell?

I received a thoughtful and practical gift today. You really need to try this stuff. It is call No.2 poo spray. Here is how it works. You spray the poo spray on the water in the stool before you go number 2 and this stuff absorbs the smell. You finish your business and magically leave the room smelling fresher than when you entered it. Only a true friend would give you this kind of gift, (thanks Christina).

Naturally my thoughts turned to God as I pondered this amazing product. I thought about the prophet Isaiah who said "All our righteous acts are like filthy rags before God". I am guessing filthy rags would have an unpleasant smell coming from them. 

Paul says "We are the aroma of Christ". Now if I put the two thoughts together; on my own I stink, but with Christ I emit not a stench but a sweet aroma. I am reminded that Christ really does cover my sin and the stench that sin produces. He then presents me holy to a righteous God. That's much better than poo spray.

So today I am encouraging you to first bathe in God's amazing grace. It will make you smell better. Then go find some No. 2 poo spray, and it will make your bathroom smell better.

Peace, todd

A Few Thoughts On Martin Luther King Jr

I am fascinated by Martin Luther King Jr. I wish I new more about this great man. I believe he was a prophet who answered the difficult call to be God's mouth piece for a nation. Historically being a prophet seldom goes well in this life

Dr. King spoke of freedom. I believe the freedom he spoke of had many facets but that it was rooted in the biblical teaching of freedom. I believe the freedom he spoke of flowed out of  the teaching of Christ who said "you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free." He understood that freedom had to start with spiritual freedom if we were ever going to be a country and people who lived under the banner of freedom.

Dr. King understood that sin always separates. It separates families, couples, ethnic groups, cities, states and countries. That fear flows out of sin. That the fear of those who are different keeps both parties in bondage. Fear fosters oppression and abuse, hate and hostility. But that Christ offered something radically different.

The movement that this man lead was motivated by christian love. He did not just speak of this love as some theory or teaching but he demonstrated this love and called his followers to do the same. He understood the kind of love that was born out of the freedom Jesus taught about and modeled was unique. This love healed relationships, that it created reconciliation and respect for others.

As I reflect on his life today I am reminded how radical the teachings of Jesus Christ really are. Dr. King took those teachings very literal. He understood that freedom, true freedom flowed out of non-violence. That turning the other cheek was not a weak position but a position of power. I do not believe there has been anyone in modern times who has demonstrated love for humanity any better than Martin Luther King Jr. This man followed the way of Christ.

Our world is a better place today because of the message he spoke, suffered and ultimately died for. Not surprising as you look back over time. We have never been very fond of prophets because they speak the truth and yet,  "the truth will set you free."

Peace, todd

Oscar or Elmo

I find myself in a bad mood this morning. Not even sure why but grumpy and irritable. Kind of like Oscar the grouch. Now I am thinking Oscar being grouchy makes some sense. He lives in a trash can and people are always throwing junk in it. I would be grouchy too. Oscar seems to enjoy the trash but maybe he does not know anything different. 

I on the other hand do know something different. I am not enjoying being grumpy and pretty sure no one else is. I was pre Elmo days but he seems to be the opposite of Oscar. That guy seems to be eternally happy. Maybe even too happy, if that is possible but the guy is happy. So I am thinking I can choose. Do I want to be Oscar today or Elmo? 

Choice is one of the greatest gifts the Father has given us. It is very empowering. So I am reminded I can choose. I choose not to be Oscar any more today. Not sure I have Elmo in my DNA but I choose to be a little more like Elmo this afternoon.

Peace, todd

Hot, Cold and Adam

Natalie was sharing with me last night about a science training she had attended. They had discussed a lesson for students helping them understand that there is really no such thing as cold only the absence of heat. I guess the reality is cold does not exist only the absence of heat. The same idea would relate to darkness. No such thing as darkness only the absence of light. Light exist darkness does not.

These scientific realities make sense to me at some level, but when I walked out of my house at 5:15 this morning, my reality was it was very cold and dark. But maybe our reality is not always true. What about life and death?

We understand that when a heartbeat stops and there is no breath a person is dead. I have sat with families in a hospital and watched a monitor flat line and the nurse check the vitals and say he has passed. I have buried people who are dead, just a corpse in a casket lowered into the ground. 

But Jesus said he defeated death, it was no more. It is like hot and cold. No cold only the absence of hot and in Christ there is only life no death. It simply does not exist. But like my experience this morning with the cold and darkness, death does seem to exist.

Saturday morning 12 friends huddled in a circle on the Katy trail. Some were new friends some old. We thanked God for the life of Adam Langford. Each of us holding on to different memories. We gathered to complete a run for Adam. He wanted to run 30 miles on his 30th birthday. He could not do that so we did it for him. 

The absence of heat made the wind sting as it hit our skin. The absence of Adam made the tears sting in our eyes. Adam running 30 miles on his 30th birthday would have been a much better story and one he would of told to the delight of many. The reason for running and the absence of Adam reminds us of death. Death feels cold, but again I am told cold does not exists.

My reality that Saturday morning as friends hugged, cried, prayed, talked and ran was life. What I experienced that morning was life, in some ways life at it's best. Adam was with us but certainly in a different way and not the way each of us wanted.

Maybe death does not exist and maybe cold does not exist, but I wish Adam being gone did not feel so cold.

Peace, todd

Hope for the Hopeless

It would almost seem silly for me to say there are times that I feel hopeless. But it is true. If you look at my life you would say that seems a little goofy. You might say that I have nothing to feel hopeless about and everything to feel hopeful about. That is also true and yet I find myself feeling hopeless some times. How about you?

I share this, acknowledging that I  am a blessed man and yet sometimes I feel hopeless. Not even sure why sometimes. Some of it seems to come from this understanding that God has so much more for me and I can't seem to step into it or just simply refuse to receive it. Either way it seems to be about me and then I think it is not suppose to be about me it is suppose to be about him.

I have told Michael who is about to graduate that we would give him a computer for a graduation present. He shared with me this week a good friend is maybe going to sell his MacBook and wanted to know if we could buy it and he would pay for half of it. I told him we could discuss that if and when his friend decides to sell. But I am thinking, "why would you buy something used and pay half when I have told you we are going to buy you a new computer and pay for it ourselves." Seems silly to me and we will have that conversation at some point. 

But maybe I am the same way with God and hope. Maybe I try to get my own hope through my own power and end up being a little dissatisfied. I wonder if God is not saying to me "Todd I will give you what you need, I will give you more, transform you into the man you were created to be and the man you desire to be." Maybe it is there, right in front of me and I just continue to try and take care of it myself and end up feeling a little hopeless.

Today I felt the sun on a cool morning and felt some hope. Thanks God! Today I was reminded there are people pursuing God and loving people and doing it in the name of Jesus and not the name of some denomination. It gave me hope, thanks God. Today I was reminded what a gift my wife and children are and I felt hopeful. Thanks again. Today I was reminded that everyday is a new day to know God and make him know, and I felt hope.

Wow! I am feeling much more hopeful. Thanks God!

Peace, todd